When I came across the top image, courtesy of repair-her-armor on a small post, I had no idea just how terrible Seven Souls Online’s portfolio (apparently also known as Martial Empires, depending on where you were in the world) was going to be.  The game officially closed doors 27 December 2012 and the original site is no longer available, however the Facebook page still survives and these amazing artifacts of bad armor design with it.

It appears that the weapon options were as ridiculous as the armor options:

Seriously what is that thing!?

Amazingly, based off the screenshots available, it appears the the game actually gets more ridiculous and pain inducing as you play.  For example, while riding mounts female characters put what little protection they have away from the saddle and ride with bare skin on the hard leather.

Bare assed on a hard leather saddle... I'm hurting just thinking about it.

My butt hurts just looking at it.

As an exercise in self-torture, I decided to put the female “Legion Armor” for the “Exiled Avenger” (I’m guessing they were exiled due to constant breaches of indecent exposure laws) through the Female Armor Bingo:

There was some fuzzy grey area for the lack of undies, thong and “looks like a bra” but I decided that with a full bingo and 14/25 squares marked… the point was made.  That armour is downright terrifying and pretty much makes fun of itself.

From what information I can find on the game it appears that the classes were gender locked – so two classes for males (Manatech Rebel and Imperial Guard) but only one for females (Exiled Avenger).  Not surprisingly the Facebook page has a disproportionate amount of pics for the the female characters.

Truly an amazing exercise in bikini armor cliches… no surprise that the reviews I could find described the gameplay as “ordinary”.

– wincenworks