Hollywood Has a Boob Armor Problem, and It Needs to Stop

Hollywood Has a Boob Armor Problem, and It Needs to Stop

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A discussion that started since Wasp’s boobtastic costume got revealed in the Ant Man movie got rekindled once new photos from the upcoming sequel started popping up.

Significant quote from the article, a response to something us female costume design critics are often accused of:

To be clear, this isn’t a call for modesty. This is a call for Hollywood to have more realistic depictions of female warriors. and more creativity in their designs. 

While it’s hard to advocate for the barbarian warrior heroic nudity in media like PG13 movies, modesty of a costume is hardly ever an issue for us (well, maybe unless it directly contradicts a specific character’s modest personality). That’s why the Female Armor Rhetoric Bingo has a "You want every woman to be covered from head to toe!” square.

As usual, though, I strongly disagree with assertion (in the latter part of the text) that movie!Wonder Woman’s armor is a good middle ground between practicality and aesthetic. Again, neither having vaguely historical references nor looking better than Amazon bikinis from the Justice League film make it an objectively good design, especially when you put Diana next to her male peers

Also, throwing Lady Sif and Valkyrie under the bus, when at worst their costumes are exactly as bad as Wondy’s and the Amazons’? Someone seems to write with DC-favoring bias >.> 

For more comprehensive commentary about the whole spectrum between genuinely practical female armor and unrealistic, but feminine and aesthetically pleasing armor, I recommend reading the Skin Is Not Necessary for Sex Appeal article we reblogged before.

~Ozzie 

h/t: @filipfatalattractionrblog

Art by Andy Park (top), and Ryan Meinerding (bottom)

These are just 2 of the various Valkyrie concept designs that were drawn up for the movie Thor: Ragnarok, and instead they went with a very bland, ugly, and boobtastic design. Even if the producers were worried that the color palette was too close to Hela’s, you can still take the armor itself and adjust the colors a bit. Just… what a shame we didn’t get to see this Valkyrie on the big screen. Hopefully, future movies will give her the kickass design she deserves.

-Icy

h/t: @grossujin

There’s been some excitement over Valkyrie’s full armor for Thor Ragnarok… but frankly I’m disappointed for the most part. 

Even Tessa’s Thompson’s badass attitude can’t fix the weirdness of this design. Top plate even has a literal hole between the breasts. It shows the layer of armor beneath instead of bare skin, but it’s still a weakening and blow-directing point on the chest. And even though relatively flat, the breastplate overall brings plenty of attention to the boobs with the shapes and colors (could it be any less subtle than painting the titties gold?).

I’m starting to think that the other, vacuum-sealed chest Valkyrie costume was some sort of “See? We can do worse!” decoy, so that the audience’s expectations are lowered enough to accept just a slightly less insulting boobplate as an improvement.

And that’s a shame, because with a better chest piece (and without the wedge heels) this could have been a cool, believable female warrior costume (even if more on the aesthetic than practical side). 

Seems to me like boob ornamentation always gets in the way of Valkyrie looking truly great, no matter which iteration of the character it is.

~Ozzie

Is it just me or does she look like she’s a party member in Mass Effect? I mean…

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She does not look like she belongs at all… Is she maybe Space Valkyrie from the Future??

-Icy

h/t: @olofahere

more of Marvel’s Valkyrie on BABD

batmanisagatewaydrug:

peachy-keen-glam-queen:

saved-by-the-notepad:

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I mean…

@batmanisagatewaydrug

so not only is this Boob Armor appallingly ugly, but it’s extra inexplicable when you consider

they clearly goddamn know how to make lady armor without boobs, what the fuck happened?

Thanks to many readers who sent photos of the MCU Valkyrie in Thor: Ragnarok our way! 

Remembering that Lady Sif from the same franchise always presented as “Stupid Hollywood Bullshit, But Demonstrates That a Completely Armored Woman Can Still Be Sexy AF” and her armor veered on the smoother side of boobplate, it’s sad to see Valkyrie’s breastplate fully embrace the vacuum-sealed aesthetic. 

Is Valkyrie’s role in Marvel to always come in and bluntly remind us that female armor has to have hypervisible boobs

What a spectacular way to ruin an otherwise cool costume design and the introduction of Tessa Thompson, a woman of color, in a role of Norse-inspired character.

~Ozzie