The hilarious front line in the tragic war against ridiculous female armor
Tag: figure
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The Masculine Beauty of Superhero Figure, Part 2
I decided to empower Daredevil, cause his premise lends itself well to wearing a skimpy outfit. After all, he’s an acrobat who cares about mobility and flexibility. He dodged all those shurikens(?) by doing all those backflips (I haven’t seen the movie since it came out, okay?)! Him doing that while fully-clothed was the most unrealistic part of that movie, honestly. Also, the rustling of the cloth against his skin would get in the way of him hearing important things. His design was really careless. :
So to improve it, I started by cutting out some key pieces of his existing bodysuit, to increase his mobility and reduce fabric noise. I also made sure that we can tell exactly how big his empowerment is. Rendering those abs was a lot of fun! (And the belt buckle says “Juicy” thanks to a viewer suggestion.)
I also adjusted his face a bit. I got rid of his laugh lines and gave him fuller, more shaped lips. He’s supposed to be hot, Elektra kissed him and everything! And since his face is now hotter, I removed some of his mask to show it off. Mmm, that crisp jawline!
I was going to give him a feather crown or something, but decided against it.
This one was definitely fun, especially since I never saw the TV show or read the comics, so my memory of DD came only from the unfortunate movie (you’re welcome for being reminded of it). Maybe we’ll empower Bullseye sometime too.
The modular design of Iron Man’s armor lent itself really great to a sexy redesign. Tons of clean lines to replace metal plates with some hot, hot bare skin and also anatomy-inspired detailing that served as a reference to painting his musculature.
I also decided while getting rid of the whole helmet might be against keeping Tony’s hero persona iconic, I did leave out the lower part, giving it the jawline from the figure’s creepily realistic replacable Robert Downey Jr. head.
The only actual changes to metal pieces on his costume I did were:
moving those glowy things under his pecs to right over his nipples – glowy nipple armor for the win!
changing the shape of his shoes to super pointy heels (also very smol size, because if female designs aren’t allowed to have feet proportional to their bodies, why should male?)
giving him an oversized codpiece, so that we know he’s very confident in his masculinity ?
While I went lazy on the rendering of repainted parts, I’m still quite happy with the results. Hope you guys agree.
And like the other one, this also comes in a black bodypaint “catsuit” version with a gun instead of a sword.
Someone please save those poor ladies!
~Ozzie
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Fixin’ Up Some Figurines, part 2 – Lizard Boobs Edition
While we’re likely to go back to fixing some Dark Sword Miniatures in the future, this here dragonkin lady was the reason I proposed redesigning the figurines in the first place. The butt cape window was always amazingly mesmerizing, considering it displays her very human glutes with no trace of reptilian tail, which would be much expected in such character design.
So I simply changed her metal thong into a decorative belt that rests on the base of her new big tail.
Another obviously non-lizard anatomy on her were the human breasts, adorned with a really ugly boobplate. So I flattened her chest and redesigned the breastplate to be more interesting, while still exposing some of the pec.
Also added a tiara with a matching jewel, for some non-tiddy-based feminine touch. Her weapon/scepter got a matching jewel as well.
It’s one of the subtler redesigns, but also one with more deliberate process behind it. Hope you like it!
~Ozzie
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Fixin’ Up Some Figurines, part 1
It’s been a while since we redid some figurines, so here we are! I decided to redesign a vampire lady made by Dark Sword Miniatures. This was a pretty fun and lighthearted one for me; I wanted to keep her Killer Abs uncovered, so I decided to make her into a gym instructor, getting that blood pumping in her students! …. Get it, cause she’s a vampire…. I’m hilarious, okay?!
It’s not armor, but I just decided to have some fun with this, considering how awkward the original is. So yeah, I just gave her a workout outfit that I’ve seen at my local gym. Here’s an example off the Internet.
I also gave her some muscles, and some dumbbells! I thought a ponytail would be more gym instructor-esque, but I was too lazy to redraw all the hair on her shoulders, so we got a… half pony. It’s fine. It’s not like she sweats… depending on which version of vampires you subscribe to.
Ever wondered if that game could do female robot design any worse? THEN YOU’RE IN LUCK! The bingo today is T-elos, who seems to be some sort of darker (and even more underbooby) counterpart/nemesis to her. When I found pics of T-elos Figma action figure (so we’re provided with 3D view from all angles), I couldn’t not put it on the to-bingo list.
Why do I call her The Incest Fairy? Well… people even remotely familiar with SAO’s lore are aware that this character’s sexualized design is only worse in the context of her story >_> The interesting twist is that this girl who joins the main character in the game turns out to be his adoptive sister/cousin, literally playing in the next room. The creepy twist is that she happens to have a massive crush on him.
So, there’s a lot of emphasis on Leafa’s ample cleavage here, with the creepy anime waifu hand gesture which I hate. I redrew her hand completely. Then I reworked her weird impractical cincher into something combined with a leather vest, to contain her breasts with something more than just the white top (which I made less boobsocky). Keep in mind her breasts aren’t smaller now, they’re just held together by actual clothes.
I also decided to give her a bit less generic anime facial features, with a more prominent nose, chin and eyebrows. Also subtly changed her eyes’ expression and added some detail to the shading on her face and hair, so that it’s all more interesting and not as weirdly 2-dimensional on a 3D figurine.
Or course, her waist was tiny and her limbs stick-like, so I gave them some heft. The most head-scratching part of her costume were the tights that somehow just… disconnect in the middle of the thigh, then continue below like nothing happened. I made them whole, then added thin green stripes, to match the one stripe on each of her arms. Also, since there was little to no contrast between where the tights end and the boot begins, I recolored the upper part of the boots into golden rings, matching ones on her wrist. Now her legs and arms don’t look like designed separately.
I also noticed what seems like a minor case of Imperial Walker Hip, or at the very least that her right leg is disjointed from her pelvis. Did the best I could to fix it with limited time and liquify tool at my disposal. It’s not ideal, but at least I also took that opportunity to not make her crotch visible from the cut in front of her skirt. I would probably repaint the whole pelvis section if I had to do it today, because even with some painting over the current results are kinda awkward.
I have no idea what those white… pillows she was standing on were, but they looked so weird and suspiciously boob-shaped (a thing really hard to not think about when looking at this figure), so I decided to erase them the best that I could with my Photoshop stamp tool skills.
Overall, not the most creative or technically proficient of my work, but hopefully she ended up as something with more balanced design than just “DID YOU NOTICE I HAVE A CHEST?”, which seemed to be the principle of the original.
~Ozzie
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SAO/GGO Figurine Redraws, Part 1: “Bulletproof Armor”
This one was Ozzie’s idea, as she’s heard a lot about Sword Art Online and then got me in on those videos. I decided to stay in the franchise but go to a different fictional MMO. This is Sinon from the in-anime game Gun Gale Online, which is about characters with guns running around doing… stuff.
I was doing some Googling trying to find the online store where I first found this thing and am now regretting I didn’t go for this picture instead:
Just kidding, I don’t regret it at all. This is a totally Serious Action Anime, not about girl butts at all.
Anyway, I’m stalling because my redesign is pretty boring, I think. Most of my time was spent trying to fix her posture. Is this another casual, confident pose? Oh sorry, the description says she “marches along the battlefield.”
Apparently she is supposed to be wearing “bulletproof armor” in the original?????????? Where is it??????? So I gave her actual coverage that would allow her to lay on the ground and snipe without getting dirt and sand inside her clothes (also known as a Yikes). Honestly, I was so distracted by her pose that I couldn’t really think of any cool design elements to give her. I even kept the stupid boob-supporting buttons on her shirt.
Maybe one day I’ll go back to this and do it some justice. At least now I can believe she’s actually a sniper wearing bulletproof armor.
-Icy
PS – God, I forgot what the back of her looked like…. enjoy!
I like me some goth characters with perky attitude (that smile is adorable!), and Jen was actually based on the woman who did this miniature’s paint job, but wow is that costume some generic fantasy garbage, scoring some typical bingo points without hitting a single row.
Obviously not the worst we’ve seen, just disappointingly uncreative.
~Ozzie
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HOLY UNDERBOOB, BATMAN!
WHAT THE FUCK AM I LOOKING AT?! Icy, why did you show it to me?! T^T
Setting aside the objectively terribad costume, maybe if it was just a screenshot I could believe that this is supposed to be a dynamic fighting stance… But having this be a figure that can be ogled from every angle, I know we’re supposed to always land our eyes on her crotch and/or underboob. That pose looks so borderline porny that I can’t help but be reminded of Greg Land’s drawings literally traced from adult movies and magazines:
