If You Hate It, Then You Should Have Put a Sweater on It (and we did)
We wanted to do a silly stream where we put sweaters on a few poor ladies drawn for Applibot’s ridiculous requests. We apologize in advance for any discomfort caused by looking at the originals.
Hoo boy. The Rain Goddess, as she is called, from the Totally-Not-Collectible-Cheesecake-Game Legend of the Cryptids. (Although I couldn’t find her page on their wiki, maybe she was removed.) I have mixed feelings about this one, because on the one hand, I’m glad I could give her a sweater, but on the other, I end up scrolling past her original picture every time I look through my BABD image folder. It’s like looking into the Void. Or as the young’ins are calling it, a Cursed Image.
Since she’s a rain goddess (I guess? that’s what the artist called her), I googled “rain sweater” for inspiration, and found this lovely children’s sweater design.
It was perfect, really. Most of the stream time was spent rendering this out so that it would somewhat match the original style. If nothing else, the artist had a great technique. It’s a shame about the subject matter, is all.
The final touches were on her face, where I gave her more of a smirk instead of a pout, and made her mascara/eyeliner run a little.
May the Rain Goddess be comfy and warm in her bright rain sweater. While kneeling in the ocean. I couldn’t fix that part. Or her evolved form.
There’s no-one who needs a cozy sweater more than Arctic Permafrost Empress (also from Legend of the Cryptids), both due to her icy domain and one of the most eyes-melting (:P) costumes.
I referenced some batwing sweaters for this, and since one-color garment looked a tiny bit bare, I decided to paint great tits similar to the ones from the Sadira redo post and made them into a fun puntastic print on the sweater. (Edit on the left)
I also changed her facial features to be more distinct and replaced her boring makeup with some blue face paint (which I only hope doesn’t appropriate any culture), just to make her tad more interesting than Random Supermodel #05867
Here’s the original artist’s blog post, with some references he used for the Empress’ design. Amazingly, seems like he came up with the weird lingerie shapes almost entirely on his own (or at Applibot’s request?).
It really seems like Legend of the Cryptids is trying to one-up its own stupid designs. This card is apparently called “The Lone Warrior Woman,” though I would rename it to “The Soon-to-be-Dead Warrior Woman.” I mean, all those straps on her stomach are basically a giant arrow pointing at her exposed vital organs. At least there’s more than 2 colors…? Also, looking at her walking in that wind is making me really cold. At least her advanced card takes place around some nice warm fire or something.
It’s really amazing how much more armor her arms receive in the upgrade, but her bra somehow gets even smaller. Never change, Applibot.
I think it’s not just her bra that got smaller, seems to me that her boobs inflated upon leveling up.
Ah, one of our
favorite repeat offenders… Seriously, though, what am I even looking at?? Is this a Red Bull ad?
So I looked up this character and the wiki page had this to say:
Only the most elite knights of the continent of Hiquba are permitted to join the Starka Temple Knights. It is considered the highest honor to join their ranks… At the grand induction ceremony in their hallowed temple, their captain Fortunata looks on forlornly. Her heart grieves at the thought of how few will live to see the end of the next war.
I have a few questions: If these soldiers are the most elite, why will so many of them die? How do they replenish their ranks? Why does the captain worry about her fully-armored soldiers dying, and not herself, who appears to be wearing a Victora’s Secret armor lingerie? Did her left foot step into a wormhole, and is that why it’s disappeared? …What’s with the cherubs…??
Her evolved armor looks a lot better, though she still forgot her pants at home, and I don’t even want to theorize on what’s happening with her breasts…
But with the improved armor comes a worse lore entry:
Fortunata leads her fresh recruits to subjugate the
ogredemonic brutes that have crossed into their borders. The unfortunate young soldiers, lacking in the strict training characteristics of the Starka Temple Knights, serve as little more than human shields. Despite this handicap, Fortunata exhibits superb technique and strength, slaying the horde with ease. She is more than willing to prove how she earned her lofty position.
What???? This lady is awful at her job, how has she not been fired? Or jailed?? She’s just leading fresh recruits to die to demons when she supposedly has an army of professionals! Is this an insurance scam? Why is she leading recruits when she’s supposed to be commanding the elites? No wonder that cherub is glaring at her!
Get her, cherub!! #TheTruthAboutFortunata2k17
One of these is from satrical RPG parody game,one is a promo for a pornographic parody and one character from an Applibot game. Applibot claims to make “high quality fantasy” games.
When you’re more ridiculous than ridicule and more porny than porn, it’s time to reconsider your design principles and concept of “high quality”.
As a follow-up to our last video post illustrating the amazing originality of “sex sells”-based game design and marketing, this week’s throwback is the reminder that arbitrary sexualization basically serves as its own porn and parody already, defeating the purpose of the real things.
Keep in mind that, as far as we know, Applibot does commission original “sexy” artwork for their games instead of stealing and/or asset flipping existing images, yet most of their designs fit squarely into the trend of generic impossible metal bikinis (and sometimes are just outright horrific – open the link at own risk).
So yeah, while directly ripping off someone else is obviously wrong, perpetuating generic sexyness with your own stuff does no good to the industry either.
And most likely will lead to having your generic stuff stolen by the asset flippers anyway.