Aphrodite in Lingerie, How Original ?

When picking out a goddess out of the SMITE pantheon to redo this time, I decided I wanted to try to make a “sexy” design that doesn’t rely on the Victoria’s Secret catalog. So here we are.

I didn’t change her body proportions at all, I only took the “in bra cup” shape out of her boobs. I gave her a draping shirt that’s more similar to ancient Greek attire. Isn’t it weird that the male Greek gods are designed to look more inspired by ancient Greek styles…. hmmmmm.

I did not give her pants, due to the ancient Greek influences, but I decided to make something out of the fact that she floats (for whatever reason). I ended up giving her a weighted skirt that would drag behind her when she moves. I imagine she could use it to great effect to look sexy or intimidating.


I left the belt in-place mostly because I didn’t have anything better to replace it with, but it’s definitely a bit much for the redesigned version. I think my shapes ended up being all over the place, but it’s still more interesting than the original. And I didn’t have to rely on lingerie for my design, what a shocker.

And last but not least, I changed her face to have more of an attitude and confidence.


Being beautiful and sexy doesn’t mean only having a specific type of face.


SMITE’s Freya Still Desperately Needs Pants

The original here is actually an updated version of Freya. As many characters in SMITE, she went through a few redesigns over time, with arguable quality of improvements (comparison source): 


The redesign

This is the second character named Freya which I fixed, and this one also got a questionable update between getting bingo’d and redesigned on our platform. I swear it’s a total coincidence. 

SMITE’s standards are below the bottom, so of course while she no longer had gravity-defying metal pasties for a top, it’s still a skin-tight boobplate


I didn’t go particularly wild with fixes this time. I liked the ornamentation and accessories well enough to leave them be, so the changes are limited to the shape of the breastplate and big blue gambeson under all of it. Thanks to it her pretty necklace suddenly popped out, since color theory is still a thing. ¯_(ツ)_/¯
Blue because it matched her existing color scheme, including those tacky Pict-like tattoos, which are already a cliche on many Norse/Viking characters, for some reason. 

Not my most creative or labour-heavy redo, but I hope you guys like it!


Return of the Sexy SMITE Gentlemen 

After the last time we sexyfied SMITE’s male gods, it was time to get back to it. After all, there was such an inequality among the character designs: the men were almost never allowed to be hot! We couldn’t have that.


I decided to go for the easy choice, Hercules (not Heracles, for some reason?), mostly cause I hated almost everything about his original design. Not even from a not-sexy-enough standpoint, just in general. That ugly face, the weird proportions (that lion head is like 4 times bigger than his), even the colors. So I changed all of that crap.

I made his head bigger and made him look younger, more innocent. I took away all of his ugly clothes. There isn’t even a loincloth there. I moved the lion’s head into his hand instead to cover his uh… lion, as it were. I decided to give him a furry little cape in its place on his shoulder so that his beautiful face wouldn’t be literally overshadowed.

In the end, I was trying to shade the lion so that it contrasted against Hercules’ skin, but I should have just made the mane dark brown instead of sticking to the original color scheme. But I think now he’s worthy of his Roman depictions.



The Norse god of mischief was always plenty intriguing, even before Tom Hiddleston made Sexy Loki a thing. So I decided to very unsubtly make it clear with my redesign – by showing as much skin as possible short of making it porn. 

In real bikini armor fashion, I got rid of almost all the clothes Loki had other than the sash, loincloth and armoring on his limbs. Made his skin a bit lighter and less sickly colored, because while we’re all for Norse characters being more than just white, it’s less problematic to sexualize a white dude than a man of color. Hope you all like those lovingly rendered muscles, I spent a lot of time painting them! 


I also replaced his edgy hood with long fiery red hair, more traditional for the depictions of this character. Another, more subtle touch was the scar on his lips, from the time he was punished by having his mouth sewn shut. 

A god who can get himself in and out of almost any trouble by shapeshifting and seducing whoever, including a horse, should really wear his sexuality on his sleeve!




@fingersareoptional replied to your post“I’ll be done with my damn term paper later today. So… What armor needs…”

Athena from Smite! All she’s wearing is some kind of dress thing with boob plates stuck to it somehow? Anyways, a goddess of war deserves more.

I don’t know what that tiddy armor is even supposed to protect. I was tempted to fix the amazon armor but honestly that would work better with Artemis than Athena.

I never played Smite so I hope I got it right!


We had some technical difficulties with our stream this weekend, fret not! We got a great SMITE goddess redesign right now.

This really is a lovely armor fix that actually uses the original’s shapes and motifs effectively! I like the breastplate and collar in particular. The headgear looks better as well, and I’m so glad her WoW-esque pauldron got shrunk to a reasonable size.

The only change I would make is to either give her a white tabbard or something else under the belt, just to break up the 2 different browns. 

Even though we’ve featured @enecola on the blog before, I will continue to recommend that you check out their blog for more cool redesigns and original character designs~


SMITE-ing Masculine Beauty! 

After League of Legends, where we fixed Jarvan and Azir, our next dude-sexyfying endeavor layed in the land of gods, double standards and shameless racism that is SMITE


Not gonna lie, after all the effort I put into Arhian, I picked an easy male material to work of. I used this official Poseidon design found on Hi-Rez’s artist’s ArtStation as a base. His left pec, abs and obliques were lovingly rendered already, so I made it my task to show off more of his muscular godly body. No big changes about his physique were needed, the costume and Poseidon’s attitude is what called for some modification. 

What I landed on outfit-wise was, appropriately enough for the lord of the oceans, a mankini. Made out of metal and gemstones.
The idea (which, I believe, Icy or some stream watcher might have suggested) was pretty brilliant solution to showcase more bare flesh while keeping the water theme. 


His weirdly low-hanging belt buckle became a decorative codpiece. Gemstones and decorative spikes accentuate the nipples.
Also I replaced strategic butt covering in his cape into a strategic butt display. Obviously, god of the sea has perfectly shaped and shiny bubble buttocks. 


Last, small but crucial change was his expression. From an angry god who will kill you for looking at him wrong into a loving, kissable daddy.


Soft Poseidon cares about you.



I wasn’t lucky enough to find a high-rez picture of Vulcan, but I decided to do the hot volcano-dwelling smithing god anyway. I removed most of his clothes, leaving only hotpants (for the hot god ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)) and a little bit of apron. It’s not like he needs protection from the furnace, he’s a god, after all. I gave him more of a wrestler body, since he’s a smith, as well as a nipple-framing suspender. But just the one.

I also made his prosthetic rounder, to match his soft, round body.


As for his face, I gave him a big, soft beard, a shy pout, and a long, smooth undercut suggested by someone during the stream (sorry I can’t remember who!). And the final touch was, of course, the curly hair on his chest and leg.


Now Vulcan is truly warm and welcoming. 


Hel Hath No Fury

From one Hel to another, this week. This particular one is from SMITE, which is a game that lets you play as various deities from different pantheons. This was their interpretation of Hel, who they split into 2 forms instead of keeping to the original mythology, where she was a person who had 2 different-looking halves. Ok, fine. But could they not have made her just a generic white woman? Twice? 

So that was my main beef with the original, besides the nonsensical clothes: the lack of any connection to her Norse roots, and her original myth. To briefly describe her game mechanics, which I was also considering while redesigning her: White Bread is a healer/support, and the Jelly Sandwich is a debuffer and does some over-time damage. The player’s able to switch back and forth between them.

In that vein, I decided to make Vanilla Wafer and Blueberry Tart into Old Woman Healer and Undead Monstrosity, respectively.

[Warning: There’s a close-up of her corpse face below the Read More!]

I was sent some lovely reference pictures of traditional Norse clothing, which I used to build the warm, functional clothing for the Old Lady half. I went with a color scheme that would evoke the frosty conditions of Niflheim, the place where her domain was located.

She floats in the game, so I was able to get away with impractically-long skirts.


I also made her a woman of color, because why not? Honestly, the sheer Whiteness of the original just had to change.


The scarf is her dog, Garmr. Since this is her healing half, the dog is nonthreatening (even though I used a wolf scarf for reference, shh).

For her debuffing half, I just took the idea of the fact that in the original myth, half her body looked like a corpse, and went all out with it. And like a corpse, she’s got no tits, cause fatty tissue is the first to go in the decomposing process.


Since she floats, she didn’t need the legs, and the dog becomes an angry knife inspired by traditional Norse knives. In-game, it would be mostly the animated knife that would attack. Over-time damage can be flavored as bleeding from a bite, stuff like that.


So that’s my Hel. I had a lot of fun working on her, especially because we don’t get to work with older ladies a lot, and I got to use a lot of cool references.

Ozzie just gave me the idea of giving each version one eye, since the corpse has 2 and the old lady doesn’t, which would have been a cool idea.

Now if only SMITE would remove their depictions of Hindu dieties, but that’s a rant for another day.





A friend’s request for a bodily comparison of the gods and goddesses of Smite.


I’m having a flashback to this Overwatch silhouette comparison (pre-Zarya, the token exception, that is):


original source: [x]

Eyup. Typical. Men tend to be all shapes and sizes, while women are just slight variations of the same “shapely” figure.






With a very few exceptions, pretty much every time I see a game brag about diverse body shapes – I wonder if they hired the same “expert” consultant that Levi’s did:


– wincenworks

more on double standards | more on character design | more on SMITE | more on Overwatch

Since everyone can predict us talking again about Overwatch in the near future, this week’s throwback is the video game industry’s bafflingly narrow definition of what “diversity” among female characters looks like.


New SMITE skins

Nais submitted:  

So, I was watching the Smite 4.21 patch notes, and I was really impressed by the quality of the skins. 

Nemesis’ new skin actually looks like half decent armor, minus the high heels. 


Discordia looked cute and mage-y. 


And then there was this. 


This is “Exterminator Kali”, who is supposed to have a “superhero feel”. She looks like one of those flag girls from car races. Had me going there for a minute with the improvement, Smite… 

Ok, that Nemesis skin looks surprisingly interesting and not particularly sexualized in SMITE’s very low standards, especially compared to her default design. It’s not perfect, of course – you mentioned high heels, but there’s also spandex chainmail on her legs and skin-tight material around waist… Though this is probably the closest they ever got to practical female breastplate. 

Dicordia could use a longer skirt, but her design at least has some personality, something nonexistent among other goddesses in this game.
As a side note, her lore starts as a coherent story (Eris flees Troy after successfully spreading chaos of war there, reinvents herself as Dicordia) and quickly spirals into something that spits into face of everyone even remotely familiar with Greco-Roman myths and history (she makes a character who is neither the ancestor of Romulus nor


Remus the original founder of Rome instead of the twins). 
Sometimes I feel this game exists only to troll mythology nerds with blatant disregard for everything that makes those stories and characters special.

Speaking of which, can we ALL, as the humanity, please stop sexualizing the Hindu goddess Kali FOREVER? 
What’s video games’ problem with her? There was a super-porny version (NSFW link!) in Rise of the Incarnates (the game doesn’t seem to exist anymore). Overwatch also felt justified in turning this powerful female deity of a living religion into a “sexy” skin for Symmetra, because the character is Indian.

We referenced SMITE’s disgusting treatment of Kali in this 2015 post about exotification and it’s as topical now as it was then:


Other than sporting four arms and blue flesh, that “Exterminator” skin doesn’t even have anything to do with Kali’s default SMITE design. And what’s “superhero” about it, too? The biggest connection I can think of is that she looks like an ultrasexualized Guardians of the Galaxy reject.


edit: A reader informed us that SMITE Wiki misspells the character’s name in Discordia’s lore: the article says Aeneus, an unrelated Greek mythology character, rather than Aeneas, the protagonist of Virgil’s Aeneid, bridge between Greek and Roman myths and ancestor of Romulus and Remus, the legendary founders of Rome.

Yes, this is Nemesis, the Goddess of Vengeance – her design makes it obvious right?  Clearly she is revenge in Ancient Greece personified!

This week’s bingo brought to you by SMITE, who continue to follow their usual pattern.  That’s right…

@ultrapastaprincess submitted:


Artio got her first skin in Smite, and what a surprise she went from fully covered to perfectly molded cleavage. This is a tier 2 skin, which is usually the base skin plus some extra stuff, not stuff taken off. The icon for it even includes her standing in a winter storm. Not the best equipment for a winter storm.



– wincenworks

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