Tag: submission

Posted on

@3dphoto submitted: 

The two “android investigators” available as KS exclusives look strangely dissimilar.

More fun here (see “Diver”): https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/diemensiongames/deep-madness

(it’s a co-op board game, which comes closest to “RPS” in your tag list. Mayebe time to add a “board game” tag?)

We received this submission a while ago but wanted to wait until the Kickstarter had expired.  Not only is this game a textbook example of double standards, it’s also a textbook example of the creativity we see in so many of these productions:

image
image

The canonical blonde Black Widow is Yelena Belova and a completely different person to Natasha Romanov (played by Scarlett Johansson in the movies) and looks, almost exactly like this model:

image

So I’m not sure if they just outright stole or if they had the some genius idea for how to make them “totally different” that Marvel did.  Either way, she’s still a better design than the fore-mentioned “the Diver”:

image

Even there shameless Ripley rip-off has to have boobsocks:

image

And the worst part is, based off the default Investigators that come with the game’s most basic package – it looks like they started with an intention to make all the designs actually just… be good.

image

I guess somewhere along the way they got led astray by Creepy Marketing Guy and lost in an old myth with no basis in reality.

– wincenworks

(Also in response to the suggestion in this submission, we’re now using the tag “tabletop games” for all board games, tabletop wargames and the like.)

Posted on

@starsked submitted:

From Magic Rush: Heroes. Every time an ad pops up, it’s a new cringe.

Given the combination of tagline and imagery… there’s only one appropriate reaction to this:

– wincenworks

Posted on

@infinitoaster submitted:

Apparently girls don’t have skeletons. Only boobs and butts.
The differences between genders is pretty bad for almost all the classes for this game, but this one was by far the worst.

(From this game: http://www.dofus-touch.com/en)

Amazingly even though the male skeletonSram’s Shadow (presumably) has no genitalia to conceal, he still gets bigger and comfortable pants than the female generic sexy witchSram’s Shadow.

I wish I could be surprised that this comes from that this comes from the creators of Wakfu and that they well… chose this as a promotional image:

image

Even before we consider the “touch” aspect, that’s some serious @eschergirls anatomy she’s got going on there.

– wincenworks

Posted on

@thetaleofthedragonage submitted:

Look at these. Please, just look. This is ridiculous.

Worst part is that not only does this go with @eschergirls proportions and the weirdest looking wolf ever drawn (seriously, it’s like they google “bad taxidermy” to get reference images) but this is actually not their worst design.  I present to you, the “Dragon Lady” hero who is  “tank”:

image

Not only does she have nipple armor, but she seems to have armor that forces her to maintain that weird and painful looking posture.  In fact most of the female characters out of their totally original, not lazy rip offs at all, line up seem to be stuck in this pose and have their gear designed around it.

So basically they made a horror game without realizing it.

– wincenworks

Posted on

Oh Magic: The Gathering

@the-hittite​ submitted:

Magic: The Gathering’s Commander decks are going to be released soon, and as usual with Magic, the women commanders are something of a mixed bag. Presented here without comment. If you want to learn more about these characters and the stories behind them check here.

image
image
image
image
image
image
image
image
image
image
image

Bonus male empowerment:

image

Sadly, while taken as a whole Magic is a major mixed bag, it’s pretty clear from a casual examination of their site shows  which side of the fence the marketing crew is on:

image

Sigh.

– wincenworks

Posted on

Hellraiser and Hell Priestess from Sideshow

@universe63 submitted:

Just in time for Halloween, Sideshow Collectables presents the Hellraiser Hell Priestess…

image
image

I know it’s not armor but I HAD to Bingo it.  I wasn’t sure how to call the garter/stocking leather boot-ish things that don’t actually go all the way down the leg. I also debated on the Skin tight square and the “How does it attach” (mostly due to those aforementioned stocking things)  Given it’s Hellraiser, “Sharp Ornamental edges…” was kind of a given.

It’s kind of amazing that even the 90s comic was more committed to genuine “in your face” body horror and some originality that gave Clive Barker’s Cenobites their charm… this one looks like they decided that what horror fans really want is Lady Death cosplaying as Pinhead with a tiny bit of body horror hidden away on her back.

So it doesn’t scare anyone who wants to fap to it.

– wincenworks

Posted on

@whereismywizardhat submitted:

Time to spoil a seven year old game.  Let’s talk about Kiera Stokes from FEAR 2: Project Origin

This is Lt Stokes

She is the only woman on the Dark Signal squad, and while technically her body armor covers the same spaces as her male counterparts, the game feels the need to have her undershirt not cover her stomach.

Naturally, she gets gut shot by recurring antagonist Aristide.

Don’t make your female characters a Stokes.

Whenever things like this happen I always imagine the creators picking an outfit for the character, laughing about an obvious problem with it then congratulating themselves for being geniuses for showcasing the flaw in their character’s choices without ever considering who really made those choices.

I can’t help but notice that they also decided that Stokes was the only one who didn’t need elbow length sleeves or elbow pads… presumably they were concerned that someone might mistake her for having arms with the kind of tone that tends to accompany intensive combat training.

– wincenworks