Tag: battle thong

Posted on

bikiniarmorbattledamage:

Thank you to icykitty for sharing the trauma of a set of armor that may actually be worse than the infamous outfit of Shahde from Prince of Persia.

– wincenworks

I like to think that the all-around badness of

this figure

kinda makes it an unintentional piece of commentary art. As if the designer/sculptor/company behind it was trying to say “You though you saw the worst of sexy female warriors? Nope, they could look like THIS!”.

And it just gets better when you turn it around and consider the anatomy… not only is her whole shoulder clearly dislocated and torso unnaturally swiveled, the sculpt of her underboobastic top makes it look as if she had an extra breast right under her armpit!

~Ozzie

Ah, sweet memories, of when I was cruising the internet for cursed content only part-time. : )

I was actually feeling optimistic lately about the state of miniatures nowadays. All the board games I play avoided this kind of low-effort designing for their lady characters. Were board game developers finally embracing the endless possibilities that not necessitating “Tiddy Out” provided??

But then I discovered that I actually living in a bubble and that a board game RPG got kickstarted in the year of our lord 2019 with this as a promised character/mini:

image

That’ll teach me to have barely-mid-tier standards! 

image

-Icy

Posted on

enecola:

As requested by @oldmanskeleton – Boudica from Fate Grand Order.

I’ll be real with you here. This isn’t really an armor fix. There was nothing to work with here. This is a full on redesign. I based her more on the depictions of the historical person because she looked badass.

There was nothing to work with here indeed. 

Fate’s absolutely abysmal treatment of Boudica, a warrior queen from Britain’s ancient history, is the logical conclusion of pushing the “Covers only nipples and genitals on the torso” bingo square to the extreme.
The blatant disregard of how clothes (and physics) work makes me wish she just wore two pasties and a c-string, which would be more honest and realistic skimpy costume than… whatever the fuck that thing on her boobs is supposed to be. 

I really love what you did with this non-costume, @enecola! Kept the only even remotely interesting part, the poofy sleeves, and put her in an actual dress, while using the original… thing’s… color scheme. Was a simple frock really too hard of an idea for the creeps behind Fate franchise? 

Literally the only thing even vaguely non-creepy about the original design is how she gains more (still very sexualized) clothes with level-ups, instead of losing them. 

image

Though, from where she started, there was room only for (strictly technical) progress, I suppose. 

~Ozzie 

Read about historic Queen Boudica on: Wikipedia | @rejectedprincesses​ site/blog | Take Back Halloween [content warning for mentions of sexual assault and violence in the descriptions] 

Posted on

bikiniarmorbattledamage:

Look, I’m not saying that this marketing strategy wouldn’t be effective at getting the attention of twelve year olds… but is this really the best way to market products supposedly suitable for pre- teens?

– wincenworks

This week’s throwback: cover image that totally tells us what the game is about and is very definitely appropriate to tweens. Yup, totally.

Seriously though, while 12-year olds are not too young to begin understanding their own sexuality interest in butts, how about we don’t make them internalize the idea of reducing women to body parts? And maybe consider what kind of message it sends to 12-year old girls? 

~Ozzie 

Posted on

theoldhack submitted (and Ozzie bingo’d): 

Here is a brilliant example of how armour magically shifts shape depending on whether it is worn by a man or a woman. All rights, privileges and blame belong to Blizzard Entertainment. I do not own these images and seek no profit from them, but merely to entertain, enrage or explicate as each viewer sees fit.

Not marking “No head protection” because this is basic armor with no additional gear, like helmets and shoes, equipped, so neither male or female PC gets one. But knowing  the track record of WoW and Blizzard in general, it’s always a safe bet that those would also have their share of frustrating double standard. 

But feel free to check this square on your personal bingo cards, especially if you also would count this sort of panties as “thong” – you’ll get a bingo row 🙂

Marking “Skin-tight armor” though, because we can see this being tight (albeit equally for both male and female player). 

~Ozzie

Posted on

So, a while ago the ever classy Soul Calibur announced that for #6, there’d be a couple of guest characters: 2B from Nier Automata who you can dress like Kaine and Geralt from The Witcher… who you can dress like generic Geralt.

So why is Ivy* in the bingo?  Well, apparently she’s critical to 2B’s… something.

Because it seems that the marketing at Soul Calibur are now so over invested in the generic myth that never pays off that even 2B was not sexy enough, so she doesn’t even get to make an appearance until 30 seconds into her own intro.

And the story is apparently… all about Ivy for some reason?  None of it seems to fit with either game, and more importantly none of it explains why we don’t have a “just got out of the tub” Geralt costume.

Give the people what they want you cowards.

* Original bingo by Icy here

– wincenworks

Gotta love the video ending on the classy note of a panty shot.

image

Thanks, I hate it!

-Icy

Posted on

“Savage Worlds is the core ruleset for all of Pinnacle’s current roleplaying games, including Deadlands, 50 Fathoms, Weird Wars: Rome, and more. It has everything you need to play narrative or miniature-based games, with quick, simple, yet comprehensive rules for everything from combat to Dramatic Tasks, Chases, and Interludes. The emphasis is on less bookeeping for the Game Master so he can quickly and easily create worlds and adventures for any setting, and focus on the players and their actions during frenetic combat.”

Frenetic… no wait, I checked, frenetic does not mean combat that involves lots of awkward nip slips and pauses to untangle gear – it’ supposed to mean the opposite of that.

It boggles the mind that studios still think stuff like this somehow signals “for all kinds of players” and “totally legit about the game experience”.

And yet, this particularly example is still better than cover of the the Horror Companion…

– wincenworks

Posted on

[Pictured above: A fighter with a “Machiavellian philosophy and appearance.”]

Oh boy, it’s what I’ve been dreading when the Soul Calibur VI character releases started; another uninspired lingerie-esque outfit for Ivy! 

image

[ x5 ]

image

It’s so aggressively boring that the details they added, like the lace on her stockings and the cords around her sides, somehow make it even less interesting. She looks like she’s cosplaying herself. They also seem to have removed the snake motifs she had previously, and replaced them with… uhh, generic skulls, I guess? Cause that’s intimidating and not overdone at all.

image

[Ivy, thinking “What, you thought this was going to be a good design? Ha!” with a knowing smile]

I guess I’ll give the devs credit for giving her a boob window while also showing off about 70% of her breasts (the lace doesn’t count as covering). That’s some next-level dedication.

image

What is it with companies thinking that professional, Machiavellian female characters wear fetish outfits?

-Icy