Now you can’t convince me that all those outfits with completely random cutouts AREN’T designed this way. Headcanon accepted. 

Fun fact: I tried to reverse google search the whole picture this comes from and the Google’s closest keyword

suggestion was Polish for “sadness”: 

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I think this search engine finally achieved self-awareness. 

And I, for one, welcome our new bullshit-detecting robot overlord.

~Ozzie

This definitely explains certain designs we’ve featured on the blog.

-Icy

h/t: @danyren, @emissaryofwind, @whiteraven13

So, if you’ve ever doubted the influence of Creepy Marketing Guy, remember that generally family-friendly Nintendo has apparently decided that the best way to market Fire Emblem Heroes is to pitch it like… basically every other mobile fantasy game.

This is a real shame since Lucinda looks pretty good:

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But apparently not in line with their goal of marketing it as “Mini-dresses, boobplate and garter-belts, the game”.

– wincenworks

(Many thanks to those who messaged in to let me know I’d initially mispelled Lucina’s name)

Amelia in Fire Emblem Heroes

FEAnon submitted (and Ozzie bingo’d):  

So the character Amelia from Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones was added to the inter franchise crossover, Fire Emblem Heroes in her General form, General being a heavily armored character class in Fire Emblem. 

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In Sacred Stones, Amelia looks the part if she becomes an armored class, but something seems off from her Heroes depiction. 

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Amelia seems to have forgotten not only leggings fro her armor, but pants. Maybe I’m missing something, but why wear heavy armor if your entire lower body is exposed? That pose and the camera focus is also real interesting of the artist. 

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Male Member of the same class in the same game.

Lets try for a Bingo!

Unimpressive bingo score, but that just shows how close Amelia was to a decent female armor design before someone decided that a girl knight should go pantless, despite being heavily armored from waist up. 

Also wow, that second big image… Gratuitous upskirt shot while she suffers costume damage? Are we sure this is Fire Emblem, not Kanpani Girls

How sad it is that the only images of this character without randomly uncovered legs are low-res sprites from an older game… Gods forbid pants on a female warrior were more than a couple pixels high.

~Ozzie 

bikiniarmorbattledamage:

Anonmois submitted: 

So, the new Fire Emblem on 3DS got announced…
Immediately, a certain female character gathered quite a number of followers.
How is she dressed you wonder?

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I don’t even know what is going on in the lower bottom. Is that a flag?

mini-mosca submitted:

Nintendo released a video showing its New Fire Emblem game and it looks really cool, but some of the armor is… questionable. Miss Purple Hair has some nice arm and waist armor, but they went the lingere route with the rest. Battle panties and a massive boob window don’t seem like a good choice for a war. The blond guy seems to be wearing very similar armor, but he gets to keep his pants on.
Fire Emblem has some really good examples of female armor, but then there are really bad ones like this. I never know what to expect.

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At this point it’s just boring how “unique” her design is. A dress with crotch cut-out to see her panties nice and clear, the bubble breasts that have a weird belt jammed between them

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..which reminds me a bit of this pointless and painful-looking “boob harness”.

So original! Much creative! Groundbreaking, even!

~Ozzie

Surely this can’t be simple pandering, clearly there’s just some sort of complex message her that I can’t see because I’m not in the Fire Emblem fandom.  Let’s see what the fandom thinks of Camilla…

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Oh…

-wincenworks

You might be thinking that making a throwback about Camilla from Fire Emblem Warriors is lazy and boring, but we’re only putting in as much work as the marketing team. [x]

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(Casual reminder that our original post went up in 2015.)

As long as they keep reusing 2-year-old marketing assets, we will continue criticizing them. Especially since it looks like that boob seatbelt has somehow gotten even worse; now it’s flat-out clipping into her flesh! That is clearly against the Breast Safety Council guidelines!

So no, Nintendo Life, I do not want to “feast my eyes” upon your trailer. I’m more likely to feast upon my eyes… yikes.

-Icy

Effie from Fire Emblem Fates (submitted by horriblecatpun)

So close, yet so far (to a good design). I even like the pink/gold color scheme! But I think we know why they left those 4 inches of skin on her legs… <sideglance at clothing damage> But this seems to be a thing for Fire Emblem ladies, unfortunately. Who needs pants anyway?

Also, is it just me, or is her left arm really long in that first pic…?

-Icy

Can we discuss how egregious her boobplate is, though?

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So much ornamentation frames the breast cups and their cleavage, just in case anyone forgot she had titties and they were very definitely separated. If no boobs, how woman, after all?

~Ozzie

Bingo: Nowi from Fire Emblem Awakening

FEAnon submitted:

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Nowi is a Manakete(Dragon in human form) from Fire Emblem Awakening. Nowi is a controversial character due to her skimpy outfit combined with her young age as a dragon as she is proportionately 14 at most, though the localization makes Nowi act more mature to downplay the controversy.

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This is made much more controversial due to the player being encouraged to marry Nowi off to other units and have children which if spoofed in this webcomic. While Now is first encountered captured, it is revealed Nowi made the outfit herself and wears it of her free will.

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A Male of the same race and class for comparison.

Anyone up for a bingo?

Bingo you say?

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Now, of course, there’s the argument that I’m sure will be coming about it being her choice, or her being a dragon so she doesn’t need protection, yadda yadda yadda.

Ultimately though, it’s very simple: If the most creative approach someone can take to a character concept such as a dragon in human form and decide it’s a “get out of criticism free card” for a worryingly sexualized teenage girl – then it’s safe to say the fluff was never really a big concern to you.

– wincenworks

So Fire Emblem Heroes came out

@whereismywizardhat​ submitted:

And I was about to complement the game’s female protag, Sharena on her design

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But then

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You have this awesome design that you decided to add hotpants to.

And then, the designers took a cue from Fate / Grand Order to really go there

clothing damage 

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NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

(for reference: This is what her brother looks like in the same uniform)

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I feel like the designers assumed that if they gave her some sort of lacey panties they felt like they’d get in trouble – so they instead gave her white hotpants so tight there’s cameltoe…. ‘cause that’s better.

And destroyable armor should, of course, be destroyed.

– wincenworks

analystpeches:

I did an armor edit of Charlotte from Fire emblem! Finished product first.

It’s not perfect, but I really like it. This is my first time finishing a large project like this (started three days ago, whew)! I want to revise other characters from Conquest, too, because I personally think that their personalities could be better reflected if their designs were revisited.

@bikiniarmorbattledamage This is an old subject, but I thought you might appreciate my take on Charlotte’s design from FE.

That’s a second attempt at fixing Charlotte’s nonsensical costume on our blog and it’s a damn solid one.

Amazing attention to detail. I especially like the belt rings which hold up her cincher. They both reference rings on her belt and gorget, while their placement is subtly implying on the character’s… naughty nature.

~Ozzie