rednosesho submitted:

Just a video poking fun at boobplates and such.

The potential disadvantages of the boobplate discussed from the point of view of the common sense.

Warning: this video is rather distracting at times 😉

~Ozzie

Video also emphasizes the importance of picking and combat technique that is practical for you as well as why you shouldn’t wear armor that sabotages your options.

– wincenworks

edit: The video isn’t available anymore 🙁

Mathieu Cesar – “Vers l’infini et au-delà

lafinjack submitted:

I just came across this, and I don’t even know. Literal boob and ass windows. (possibly NSFW)

WTF did I just watch? I’m guessing the ultimate proof that no matter how hard you try to pass something that ridiculous as “artsy” it doesn’t all of sudden stop being silly.

~Ozzie

Okay, look – there’s a right way and a wrong way to homage Metropolis.  This was definitely the wrong way.

(Apologies if it didn’t show first time you looked – for some reason Tumblr decided it wouldn’t show the video at first posting.  Bad Tumblr.)

– wincenworks

A fascinating insight into the design process and choices considered by Bitcomposer Games when it comes to female characters:

  • Underboob or overboob?
  • Knee high boots or thigh highs?
  • Boob window or just fully open low cut v-neck?
  • Wonderbra, regular bra, demi-cup bra or no bra?
  • Leaning forward so we can see down her top, or arching her back weirdly to pull in her stomach?

So much depth!

Of cleavage.

– wincenworks

quoms:

cupiscent:

petermorwood:

ancientpanoply:

A video made for the Museum of Cluny, and its “The Sword: Uses, Myths and Symbols” exhibit. It tries to dispel some of the beliefs that are still prevalent today about the weight and mobility of fighters in plate armor and show some of the techniques used in combat against armored opponents

I’m always pleased to see videos like this. It’s as if people won’t believe unless they’re shown (and there are always some who go “ah, yes, well, in aluminium stage armour it’s easy.”)

Well, the Museum Cluny video, like the Royal Armoury demo team, uses real steel armour: those two pictures at the start show the originals; the video uses reproductions because no curator will let someone take two exhibits from his museum and roll them around on flagstones. Mike Loades in the UK has been doing similar armour demonstrations for years, as has Tobias Capwell of the Wallace Collection. Eventually the old “clunky, immobile, in with a wrench, out with a can-opener” image of plate armour will go away – but I won’t hold my breath. (That shade of purple isn’t a good complexion anyway…)

Even the faster demonstrations of these combat techniques are still dialled back to about half speed. Try to visualise how much quicker and more brutal this would be if the two fighters meant business, when the first rule was Do It To Him As Quickly As Possible Before He Does It To You.

Writer and swordsman Guy Windsor writes about doing motion-capture work for a computer game; his completely authentic techniques couldn’t be used because they were so small, fast and economical. The game needed big swashing movements because the real thing looked unrealistic, too insignificant to be effective…

You won’t see a “killing fight” (full speed, full power, full intent) recreated very often, either on documentaries or in museum exhibitions, because it’s very, very dangerous for (when you think about it) obvious reasons. These techniques from 600-year-old fight manuals were how men in armour maimed and killed other men in armour – and since they’re the original material, not a re-interpretation after 600 years of being diluted down to sport-safe levels, the techniques will still maim and kill men in armour. Even a blunt “safe” sword is pointed enough (first demo on the video, 1:54-59) to go into a helmet’s eye-slot and through the skull inside…

But if you’re lucky enough to see a full-speed demo between fighters in real armour using wasters (wooden practice swords), be prepared to pick your jaw up from the floor. It is awesome. And also as scary as hell.

Comments on comments:

“Pretty much proof positive that the people who claim that skimpy female fantasy armor is for increased maneuverability don’t know what they’re talking about.”

They know exactly what they’re talking about. They want to see T&A on fantasy game and book covers, and since they don’t have the balls to be honest about it, this is their excuse.

It amazes me that the old saws about Western armour and techniques are still going about, because surely two minutes’ thought would let you know that of course knights had to be able to get up off the ground…  Europeans were wearing armour for centuries, why wouldn’t they develop techniques of fighting in it?

It’s easier to laugh (do the same people laugh about samurai?) and repeat what “everyone knows about armour“ than it is to waste that two minutes thought. Thinking might reveal something to mess with set opinions, and that would be annoying…

Biggest pet peeve: People commenting on the weight and shape of armour restricting mobility…

As before – “everybody knows” that European armour is massive and clunky because that’s what “everybody knows.” God forbid they should ever apply the “if it was so useless then why was it used” logic to anything. Because then they might realise that what “everybody knows” is wrong.

I’m going off to (not) hold my breath for a while… 😛

I saw this video in the fascinating special exhibit at Cluny last time we were in Paris. So pleased to be able to have it on tap, because it was most excellent.

image

As previously mentioned, the most important factors in considering armor design for a character are:

  • What does it have to protect them against?
  • What do they have to be able to do?
  • What is available?

These suits are show casing some great armor made for a person who needs to protect themselves against swords and arrows, fight and lead troops on the battlefield and had access to a lot of money and an skilled armorer.  Unsurprisingly, they are super practical for their intended purpose.

The argument that they might wanted to trade off protection for a little more speed doesn’t hold up because once these guys got into battle it was simply ridiculous to think they’d be able to keep track everywhere an attack might come from.

Basically if you want to survive a battle, you want to be as well protected as possible, and as that video shows: The upper limit to how well protected you can be and still move freely is pretty damn high!

– wincenworks

May I request captioned GIFs for every moment this reviewer comments on how offensively stupid designs of this game are?

 Why do you even have this giant armored robot if you’re just hang at the front of it, so everybody can see you?! (1:51 – 1:55)

By the end of this video I want to figure out what is up with that underwear. It’s not even underwear. She has, like, A TATTOO… for… underwear. What is it??? I don’t know… (2:12 – 2:25)

You know, I think I wanna put some glasses on you, so you’re AT LEAST a little bit more covered up. I’m sorry I can’t help you, really… (2:41 – 2:48)

Despite my best intentions, she’s not wearing clothes again. I tried. I tried to give her at least the glasses… No. (2:58 – 3:07)

EVERYTHING IN THIS GAME is sexualized to the max. You think you’re safe going over to this vending machine, but oh, nope, the vending machine’s showing you its ass. (6:06 – 6:15)

What is on your butt? How old are you? You just told me that I have to be level 10. You look like you’re 8… (6:22 – 6:30)

edit: updated links
edit 2 (18.08.13): updated links, again