Tag: Female Armor Bingo

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Thanks joabobs for for the tip about Legacy of Discord. I was having fun with this bingo (picked out of several different options that were equally generic and lingerie-y) but then I found this image and I died a little more inside:

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I mean, besides the hilariously obvious double standard, that… whatever it is she’s wearing is so uninspired, and the messy rendering makes me think they spent an entire 25 minutes on it because Creepy Marketing Guy wanted a Hot Chick™ on the advertisement. Her giant hat is the coolest thing about her design, but even that isn’t done well. Compare her to the guy on the right, who has what looks like a literal bear trap on his armor. I want one of those! (Also the shape language on him is just a lot clearer.)

I got distracted from the original point of this post, but do I really need to say more about Ms. Furious Wings up there besides Kerrigan Lingerie Victoria’s Secret Angel?

-Icy

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Not a very impressive bingo, considering this “armor” seems to be mostly covering and even includes pants (such a rare feat!), but there are a couple things making up for it:

  • How absurdly overdesigned it is, to the point that it’s hard to make out what is what. Especially with all the random elements and blue light effects floating everywhere.
  • The description: “The master of Frost, holy and sexy, dominate the battlefield with powerful magical mirror!”

HOLY AND SEXY, you guys! Whoever is Legacy of Discord’s copy writer, they should get a raise just for that spurt of “creativity”.

~Ozzie

Maybe their shaders glitched out as they were taking these screenshots. She looks more like the master of Headaches.

-Icy

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We referenced AutoBattle once before, but didn’t get the opportunity to talk about their super creative

and totally equal

character and costume designs. 

They broke a bingo, so they don’t get a Vegeta gif.

I’m so moved… the void of absolute fantasy genericness and blatant double standards that Spirit Stones left behind is filled at last!

Apparently that bingoed lady elf’s body, particularly the holes in her armor, were used as a backdrop on the game’s site [source]. 

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How classy!

~Ozzie

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@averyordinarymop submitted:

So this ad popped up on my instagram. All I can say is… at least they acknowledged that the game is only geared towards heterosexual men?

@ihavenotfallenyet​ submitted:

I saw this on facebook. I’m not surprised, yet still disappointed.

Time to bingo that… thing.

At this point I’m so desensitized to random boobwindowy dress-lingerie-armor-thingies like this that I’m more distracted by her freakishly long legs than her boobs obviously slipping out in a second.

~Ozzie

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(Half-mark on the thong because it appears she has briefs with little windows to simulate the thong look. Just think, someone had to model that… and the mini underboob windows too.)

We’ve had a few people respond to the Nier Automata post with asks and submissions about the foul mouthed, incredibly violent sidekick from the original Nier game: Kaine.  (Trivia: Kaine is one of the very few canon intersex characters in video games, in one version of the game, which adds all kinds of baggage to this outfit and her depiction in general)

For those interested, this is the hero, Nier… both versions of him (It’s complicated and Kaine is dressed the same in both versions):

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For those interested in how this went from being pulp fantasy to a cyberpunk war of androids in couture and VR goggles against alien robots… you can probably guess there is no simple explanation to anything.

Suffice to say though, Yoko Taro’s confession that he just likes putting sexy girls in his games was entirely unsurprising.

– wincenworks

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sunfishfusions:

eschergirls:

probably-unreliable submitted:

Djeeta by Minaba Hideo, she’s one of the two main characters from a Japanese mobile/browser game called Granblue Fantasy.

The last pic is her male counterpart to for some comparison between the two characters.

TFW you’re on a beach vacation and the boss calls you into work >_>

@bikiniarmorbattledamage

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This is by far the least imaginative gladiatrix/ancient female warrior costume we’ve had on BABD. Literal modern bikini/underwear set with normal armor on arms and legs! 
Even her cuisses are shorter to enhance femoral artery stabbing show more luscious thigh flesh.

One thing that’s particularly funny when comparing the two is that the guy has no upper arm protection, while lady gets big pauldrons and besagews attached to nothing! Yup, their function as auxiliary armor is so totally not compromised by the lack of breastplate.

~Ozzie

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the-hittite:

Just so we’re clear, Chandra, Torch of Defiance wears the most practical version of her armor to date. (The least practical goes to the manga adaptation of The Purifying Fire.) But compared to the armor designs worn by other residents of Kaladesh, it seems a little out of place.

For those curious regarding the fore-mentioned manga:

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Essentially the spectrum highlights the problems that happens if a company like Wizards sets a vague design for a character then tries to “fix” it (depending on their priorities on any given day) without ever changing it in a meaningful way.

In this case, if you compare to the previous images of Chandra from the official Magic the Gathering imagery, the changes are:

  • Swapped chainmail for scalemail (both of which are absent in the manga)
  • Given her more substantial faulds (which are decorative in the manga)
  • Given her a weird collar/gorget thingie
  • Added extra cloth to her loincloth and made it heavier
  • Made her boots go all the way up to (presumably) her groin
  • Given her actual hair instead of just fire

So essentially all her redesigns and attempts to redevelop her were all preemptively critiqued in 1994, by known intellectual Lisa Simpson:

– wincenworks

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the-one-potato submitted (first image; bingo and other images added by Ozzie):

This is a Yu-Gi-Oh equipment spell card. It might give the wearer a big boost in their attach stats, but what it doesn’t say on the card is that the defense of the wearer will drop even more…
(Yu-gi-oh has lots of bad cards, it’d be a bad idea to send all of them your way, but this one is so BABD-appropriate, I couldn’t hell myself)

Seeing how bingo-qualifying this… thing is, I checked out what those harpy lady sisters who can be equipped with the “shield” look like… Let’s agree the anime didn’t disappoint my morbid curiosity. Also, apparently English version of the card censored out the protruding nipple spikes: 

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I didn’t cross out the “More advanced armor = skimpier”, cause the harpies seem to wear this spiky atrocity on top of their usual bodypaint “clothes”:

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~Ozzie 

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@kimarous submitted (and Ozzie bingo’d):

Ai-yi-yi… found this monstrosity while exploring the Sacred 2 wiki: the High Elf’s “Frozen Gems” equipment set. Double bingo at least, maybe even a triple. Bottom two rows for sure.

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I’m only surprised her buttcheeks are covered properly. Going by the rest of this design, battle thong should be a given.

~Ozzie